jinxMe3
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Name: Jinx
Country: United States
State: Pennsylvania
Birthday: 12/28/1991
Gender: Female


Interests: MUSIC:Metal:Lamb of God.Slipknot.Otep.KoRn(the old KoRn).and more.JapaneseMusic:Dir En Grey.UtadaHikaru.YokoKano.and more.Techno;ASIAN FOOD:Sushi.SpringRolls.GeneralTso'sChicken.bubble tea.Fried Dumplings.green tea icecream.and more;ART:Mark Ryden.KidRobot.drawing on my own.MY FRIENDS:My french friends: Going to clubs and dancing like crazy with them...sitting arround and doing nothing with them...and more.My friends in general...the ones that dont live so for away(the ones in emerica):watching them beat each other up.watching them play video games.going to the movies with them.hanging out and doing nothing. or going to burger king and ordering a large amount of there discusting yet iresistible food.Also...there are the people i meet along the way...at crazy music festivals...or in comic book stores..or online...;ALSO: Hairdye.Peircings.tattoos. scarification.mutilation.ANYTHING ASIAN.ASIAN GIRLZ.MOVEING TO JAPAN!!!!
Expertise: I'm good in Art..mostly Visual arts. Applying Chapstick. Dyeing my hair. beeing myself.Loveing Asians
Occupation: Student
Industry: Art


Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM: JeSuisAnarchiste
MSN: JinxMe3@hotmail.com


Member Since: 11/7/2004

SubscriptionsSites I Read
kickthebucket_lays
unsoundaffliction
softly__spoken
yourf_ckingbeautiful
thoughtsofnothing
Draakken
cherrythatwantsyou
X3xNoteToSelfxX3
dude_19
corruptedd_x
catbabycat
xmissxmissyx17
lonewolfxl71
neilismywhore114
kalinpunk
break_a_robot
Oni_Zeriph
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Cutting, Suicide, Depression
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[::*aNiMe ObSsEsSiOn*::]
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+ J A P A N +
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Atheism
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deep asian love
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Bisexual/lesbian just for teens
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Lesbians
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I kiss girls and i'm a girl ( Lesbians )
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Thursday, September 04, 2008

Currently Listening
Young Team
By Mogwai
see related
loneliness. it rising into my concious. its become noticible .enexplainable.
like i feel like i cant turn to anyone for comfort.what use to bother another with my pain.its something only i can figure out. something only i can ajust. but is it just.is it fair. to feel alone with no one to turn to for help. friends family, all oblivious to the internal pain i feel. internal.my own.inside.only me. only i...can figure it out. can set the suffering aside. thats all there is to do. deal deal deal. playing cards, drawing the right ones in the deck...the right ones. right.happiness.is it right to feel happiness it seems as though nothing around me is wrong.so why do i feel like everything is wrong. gone. where. what do i want. what do i seek out of this life. i cant even piece together that part. i sometimes don't know where i stand. but who does, we're all floating in space, we all have our feet on the ground. we all have brains, hearts organs. feelings. we choose to feel a certain way as a reaction to a situation. so if we analyze why we feel a certain way because of the trigger that caused this reaction to the situation, then can we change? what if we don't understand we we react and feel a certain way because of a situation? then where do we go.
i am me. i feel, i walk, i sleep, i smell, i taste, i hear, i think. what makes me me?
my brain...the formation of myself as a child, my experiences. the reactions to situations. the feelings i feel when you touch me. why? because.


Thursday, June 26, 2008

Currently Listening
Fur & Gold
By Bat for Lashes
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another day

i was suppose to go in and go to the coalition for peace action, to work as a canvacer..knocking on peoples door to get donations to stop the war. but whats the point when almost everyone shuts u down... and are we really makeing a difference... we're not makeing a revolution here..we're just trying to loby congress men like joe sestac, to pass a bill so no more funding goes to the war. i cant do t.. i cant stand there looking into all those peoples eyes that dont really understand where we stand.
should i do a job i have no motivation to do... even if i have no back up plane, no other job..still im 16 and really not willing to really give to shits. im suppose to be in school mom says, but im homeschooloed, and even if my motivation is low for that as well, atleast i still feel like im learning everyday.
i guess college will lead me somewhere.. if i go, i prefer it be outside the UNunited states, maybe Canada or Europe... studying psychology, sociology, anthropology... and nero science maybe... just the study of humans intrests me.
blahh.
liffe sux..but its beautiful


Saturday, May 31, 2008

Currently Listening
The Understanding
By Röyksopp
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Another day.
 roaming arround the city? what to do? i've seen all of Philly
im not spontanious enough to just enjoy whatever comes along. to go to wild places and parties without of question of.. "is this really what i want to be doing?"
im tired.
yesturday i went to crazy house... Valery. Audrey.Drew.Sarah.Nikolll.Matt.Dan.Ariel. opium.nd the white powder that never seems to be saticfying enough...
why.poison the vessel i have for this world? whats the point. its 'fun' in some sense... but what isn't fun? you create your own joys. whats so fun about feeling a certain way from a faren substance entering  your body? why cant you just be your "own".
Party..for what..to be around people i don't know..to get drunk enough not to care. to become oblivious, to take in reality...even if i dont accept it.
why?
im tired.
i just want to lay down.

(sometime in the last few days) i dreampt of the person i loved in the past. of him and i rejoining, of missing each other so much. of shareing the love again, that we used to previously share. i dreampt of a kiss so real..him holding me, feeling wanted. accepting...it all
im tired.
tried of sex..fucking fucking fucking..over and over, not to feel anything but saticfaction, artificial temporary control love pain, all of the emotions all at once, but no orgazm... the rize of saticfaction, artificially created by the fact i want to make 'him" happy. i want to throw up.

Sometimes i try to explain my problems to people, but its not the problems that i want to explain, its the way i react. the way i deal with situations. Everyone has problems. but we all are our own universe... which makes me feel like im alone. i feel like i dont make sence.. but why should i care?
be myself!!!
what is myself.

kill the ever changing colors of the Cameleon...


Friday, May 30, 2008

Currently Listening
The Adventures of Ghosthorse and Stillborn
By CocoRosie
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it's been been too long.
i suppose i could keep this for myself, its not like anyone still goes on xanga.. and if they do. please leave me alone ..unless maybe if i know you.

Life has take its course. to much has changed to even make a list.
I feel like ive become weaker... mentally weaker, blocking myself with some sort of outside barrier that seperates what really goes on in that head of mine.
i guess i could say i duel in the past sumtimes..it just seems like the feauture doesn't look to bright... but im just putting myself  down.
it seems the more you grow up, the more info you take in, the more problems i create fro myself, problems that i now view in such a diferent way then before. back then. it was all about.. fuck the world fuck people... i made myself an outershell...but it was nothing but a sponge... and  now that sponge has socked up just about all it can...  when will i ride myself of all this blood.

eh.

im going out


Sunday, April 08, 2007

Currently Listening
Amelie: Original Soundtrack Recording
By Yann Tiersen
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Call Me up..maybe we can chill...
i walk to the bus stop and wait for the bus to come....
there HE is waiting for me..i didnt see HIM come along..He just magically apeared there accross the street.
Lets walk down Bainbridge ...
off to Bens.
The smell of alcohol sorrounded them..the poisen running through there body.
i was sobber.
Strip Pocker is next.one item of cloths after the other. HE is the winner but HE deside to be fair and remove HIS paints.
they go into the bedroom.we stay and watch tv.
HE kisses me to run away from HIS problems. though they are still there and will never go away.
i let HIM use me..its all just a game...but no sex..thats to far...id like to have some restraint over what i do. i know its all a game and i care for HIM to much to have him regret it.
i dnt mind if HE wanted to make her jelous..i didn't mind if He endlessly kissed me for hours.. i like HIM. regardless that HE doesnt really like me... its ok if He plays me like an instrument picked up only to destract one from the pain.. use me as your drug.. fuck me if you please.i dont mind as long as your happy.
There i go again messing peoples lives up..
i make one person happy and another ssad. thats what i do.i let myself be used as a toy by others.because i dont mind.thats all i am to them anyway.
Slap me in the face.it'll make you feel nice about yourself.you know you want to.i dont mind.
ill walk away and rethink the sittation..either way itll all go blank .
i run endlessly through the streets hopeing to find him..i run and run but no one is there..its ok though..i was just used..im just a toy.
they can do what they want to me..just fuck me..hit me.chill with me.kiss me..i dont mind...
im just here for peoples satisfactions.i dont mind.i mean it hurts sometimes...but so what? thats life?
why shouldn't i be treated that way.thats what people do and i am used to it...i should be able to make people happy in any kind of way...what abbout me?? am i happy? it doesnt matter...watching the people i love smile is enough...
well i am happy if they are happy ^_^..all i can do is smile...and give myself to others... its all good.

..Jinx

i just needed to let things out..i dont care if the whole world reads it...its not going to make a diffrence. dont feel sorry for me..i dont need anybody's pitty. dont tell me i should do shit for myslf because i dont care...



Next 5 >>

      
Marriage is love.
Ultimate Opposite Sex Survey (for girls)
--Your Favorite--
Hair Color::any color
Eye Color::any color
(Their)Music Genre Preference::metal
Height(estimate)::doesn't matter...but no shorter then me ...(im 5 feet)
Age::15 or older
Personality Type::mysterious...
--This or That--
Older or Younger::older
Romantic or Horndog::romantic...
Smart or Stupid::smart
Fat or Skinny::skinny
Skinny but Muscular or Big and Muscular::just skinny
Punk or Preppy::...neither....
The Big Picture or the Little Things::?huh?
Flowers/Candy or Big Expensive Present::i don't need presents...
Mixtape or Burned CD::burned cd
Love or Lust::both
Emotional or Just Not::not to emotional...im not an emotional person..
Sincere or Jokester::both...knows when to be and not to be
Hott and mean or Ugly and sweet::Ugly and sweet...not to ugly...i need to be attracted to the fucking guy
Sexy or Just Cute::both?
Arse or Abs::what kind of question is that..
Hair or Hands::idk
Dimples or Eyes::eyes
Biceps or Calves/Thighs::what kind of question is that...
Teeth or Nose(some people are just wierd) ::im not weird..
Clean Shaven or Scruffy::idk
Rugged or Prim and Proper::*sigh* these questions suck...
Countryboy or Cityboy:like i care...
Date alone or With Friends:both... i don't give a fuck...though its nice to be alone with the person once in a while
Mama's Boy or Rebel Without A Cause::not to atatched to his mom...
--Have You Ever--
Dumped a guy because he liked you too much::no...
Loved a guy because he stalked you::no...
Loved a guy because he hated you::uhhhh...maybe...liked...love is not a good word...
Asked your friend's crush out::no!!!
Lead a guy on for kicks::...uhhhhh...
Asked a guy out purely because he was hott::nope
Flirted with guys even though you had a boyfriend::yes..
Lied about not having a boyfriend::no...haven't done that yet
Lied about having one::nope...
Cheated::by accident...
Been Cheated on::yes!!
Had a crush on a gay guy::nope...i mean some are cute...but no
--Their Clothing(yes/no)--
Boxers?::yes
Briefs?::...
Hat?::don't care
Skater Shoes?::yes
Pimp Shoes?::no
Band Shirts?::yes
Vintage shirts?::yes
Southpole/um..other thug clothes..?::no
Dixie Outfitters/Big Johnsons?::huh/?
Independent/DC?::yes
S&M/Little Devil?::what?
Fox/Thor?::what?
Jeans or Shorts?::jeans(thats not a yes or no question)
--Be Honest--
Would you ever date a guy for his money?::NO!!! he could be poor i wouldn't care
Would you ever date a guy for his social status?::no!!! he could be hated by everyone but me...and i wouldn't care
Have you ever liked hanging out with your bf's friends more than him?::no
Have you ever pretended to like somebody to make them feel better?:...yes...saddly...
Have you called a girl a whore, when you were screwing lots of guys?::no
Do looks matter?::no
Are you honestly scared of being dumped?::welll...if its a guy i really really really really like...then yes
Does size matter?::no....not reallly
Do you avoid 'situations' with ugly guys?::an ugly guy has never liked me...and im not shallow
Are you ashamed to be seen with your ugly friends?::my friends aren't ugly...
Are you ashamed for being ashamed?(you better be)::what the fuck did i just say!!!
Do you hide things from your crushes/guy friends/bf?::not really...maybe...sometimes...not really though...
Do you lie about masturbation for attention or false innocence?::wtf.....?? re frase the question so i understand it prperly...then call me
Do you really want a guy to say if those jeans make your butt look fat?::i have my ass
Are you dissapointed when your bf doesn't say I love you right away?::no...not at all...
Wanna be a virgin till marriage?:i don't belive in marrige
Do you really love the guys everytime that you say it?:yes....welll actually no...i never loved my ex...told him i did cause i felt sorry
Do you dream about your crushes/bfs/guy friends?::nothing sexual...thats only with girls...
Would you makeout with a guy friend just to get it over with/curiosity?::wtf/????
Does this survey suck nuts?:yes!!!!....it sux... not sure about nuts...i mean i don't know this survey personally...
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Would You Ever...? Be Honest!!!!!
Would You Ever...
smoke pot?:yes
smoke a cigarette?:yes
do other drugs?:shrooms
drink and drive?:nope
drink before your 21?:yes...not get drunk though
makeout with a total stranger?:not really..
makeout with a member of the same sex?:of course
would you do it for money?:yes
how much?:anything...hey id do it fo free
have sex for money?:no
how much?:no
jump off a building?:yes
go skydiving?:yes
go bungee jumping?:yes
cheat on a bf/gf?:no
have you ever?:be accident
play strip poker?:...maybe?
curse in front of your parents?:yes
get naked in front of a total stranger?:...no...
pose to look cool?:as a joke
lie to get out of trouble?:...not really
run in the rain?:yes
dance in the rain?:yes
go skinnydipping?:yes
steal a car if no one would catch you?:...if no one could catch me
rob a bank if you wouldnt get caught?:sure...if there is no chance of getting caught
dance in front of a crowd?:...not really
sing in front of a crowd?:no
ask someone out?:yes
dump someone?:yes
kill someone?:yes
run away from home?:yes
kill yourself?:yes
change yourself to please someone else?:no...
dye your hair blue?:i have
do something not on this list?:yes
what??:kill you...and rape asians...move to japan...and more
take this survey again?:maybe..
Did you...
enjoy this survey?:its ok
think it was stupid?:yes...sort of
Thanks For Taking
My Survey!!!
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